It's completely surreal to me that I'm leaving for Connecticut tomorrow morning just a few hours from now. It feels pretty much just like any other night right now even though I know it's not. I left home from college and spent a couple summers interning in various places, but this feels different, more permanent.
When people have been asking me how I feel about leaving or living on the east coast, I've always answered with some form or combination of excited or nervous. Excited because this is the first time I'm really, really on my own. I get to truly be my own person far away from my home and basically everyone I know. I get to have a real job and make many more of my own decisions. Nervous because...well, the same reasons.
I think ultimately both emotions stem from my feelings about identity. In a completely new place, I get sort of a fresh start, a new chance to create and/or flesh out who I am. At the same time, in a lot of ways by moving so far away, I'm losing parts of myself too. It's weird to think about because do I really become a different person just by leaving one environment and going to another one? A lot of the time I (and I'd guess most, if not all of, us) find it easy to identify myself by factors that are easily picked out. What I look like, where I live, who I hang out with, etc. But, as I am learning extremely rapidly, these types of things can change so quickly and so drastically.
Leaving everything and everyone behind is teaching me that the only thing I can cling on to, and thus the only thing I can truly identify with, is my relationship with my God. It's not always perfect and often I falter, but I know that God is there to pick me up no matter how much I stumble. My relationship with Him and my belief that he is a good, loving, eternal God who has saved me and all mankind from a destiny of eternal damnation should be the basis of who I am and I want to work towards that each day. People and surroundings may change, but He does not, and as I'm getting ready for a huge move, I'm glad that I can hold on to that.
On a different note, we (my parents and I) will be spending the next few days driving across the country to my new home in Connecticut. This will be by far the longest road trip I've ever done, and I'm looking forward to a lot of boring roads and long naps while my dad is at the wheel. As disorganized and lazy and stupid as I can be, I will always be thankful to my parents for helping me out in this and I feel really lucky to have them in my life for this and many other reasons.
We'll pretty much just be straight driving and I don't even know if the places we're staying along the way will have wi-fi, but I'm going to try to tweet as much as I can, if only to keep myself from being too bored. But anyway, it's been a fun 22 years of my life on the west coast. I hope to make it back someday (someday soon, please), but I trust and leave everything in the hands of God because I believe His plans are better than my plans. Please do hit me up if you're ever on the east coast. See you on the other side.
Friday, June 22, 2012
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Why I want the Miami Heat to win
I should say first of all that I'm not a bandwagon Heat fan. I'm not any Heat fan, and I am not exactly rooting for them in the most typical sense. But as someone who likes the NBA, I would like to see them win this championship.
Ultimately, my reasoning is pretty simple. I believe that Lebron James is easily and by far the best player in the NBA today. And so it frustrates me that this is buried beneath the constant stream of criticism (valid or otherwise). I guess it's not surprising that in our culture, which is largely selfish, greedy and critical, we focus on Lebron's faults and what he doesn't have/can't do. He chokes in the clutch. He doesn't have a ring. He's a selfish player. He has no post game.
I know this because I used to be one of those people. It was absurd to me that people thought Lebron was better than Kobe Bryant (although a few years ago it was much closer). Lebron hadn't won anything. He hadn't repeatedly carried his team through the playoffs as Kobe had done in the Smush Parker/Chris Mihm days. For a guy his size, he looked clueless and helpless with the ball down low. He shot too much and too poorly from midrange and beyond.
But over the past couple years, now that I've actually watched him play...it's so obvious that he is the best player in the league. Obviously anything can happen in the next 1-3 games, but I find it hard to believe that people can honestly think that Kevin Durant is a better player than Lebron.
I love KD. In my brief basketball fandom, he's one of the best scorers I've ever seen simply because he can score from anywhere on the court and with his athleticism and freakish length, there's often not much you can do to stop him other than hope that he misses. Still, I think that the suggestion that he is superior to Lebron is outright laughable.
The fact that this has even been brought up is proof enough for me that the massive microscope of criticism we've turned towards Lebron has blinded us from appreciating the entirety of his game. I mean over the first four games of the finals he's averaging a 29.3/10/6 line and making it look routine. In the regular season he led his teams in points, rebounds, assists, and steals.
But his dominance should be clear even without looking at the numbers. His rebounding, court vision, and passing are much better than most people his size or at his position and he can assert himself on both ends. On the offensive side of the court he's a strange combination of size and speed, which generally allows him to shoot where and when he pleases either by beating his man to his spot or bullying him off of it. His shooting has greatly improved since he was a rookie and, despite what haters might say, his post game has as well. On defense, his size and speed again give him an advantage as it allows him to guard every position effectively. While there are several players who could likely get the better of him over the course of a full game, I truly think he could be fine defending anyone (without fouling) in the NBA for at least a handful of possessions.
Meanwhile Kevin Durant just played the biggest game of his life and the 6'9" (who many claim is closer to 6'11") forward grabbed two rebounds in 46 minutes of play (exactly the same amount as Miami's backup point guard Norris Cole had in eight minutes) and got outleaped on a crucial jump ball by Shane Battier, a 33 year old veteran with creaky legs. Durant's also had so many problems defending without fouling over the past few games that he was on point guards Mario Chalmers and Cole for long stretches of time.
This is not to hate on KD. He is a phenomenal player (and a good rebounder most of the time), but I don't know how else to illustrate what I perceive as a large, noticeable gap in between the two players. I don't know if any of this was actually necessary. I'd like to think not. I'd like to think that this was all very obvious, both because it would be nice if my views were validated and because again, I think it should be apparent to anyone who has watched basketball.
With all of this said, if the Miami Heat lose, especially now with a 3-1 lead, Lebron James's overwhelming talent will be even more obscured (granted, if they do lose three games in a row it's highly probable that harsh criticism of his game will be warranted). As fans, I feel like this hatred is preventing many of us from actually appreciating his game and realizing that we are, and have been, witnessing some of the finest displays of athletic ability on a basketball court. I get the backlash over The Decision. It was incredibly idiotic and out of touch. But are we really going to let a misguided 30 minute television special color our views so much that we miss out on just watching and letting ourselves be amazed at what Lebron does on the court on a nightly basis? I got over it and, if the Miami Heat close this out, it's about time everyone else did too.
Ultimately, my reasoning is pretty simple. I believe that Lebron James is easily and by far the best player in the NBA today. And so it frustrates me that this is buried beneath the constant stream of criticism (valid or otherwise). I guess it's not surprising that in our culture, which is largely selfish, greedy and critical, we focus on Lebron's faults and what he doesn't have/can't do. He chokes in the clutch. He doesn't have a ring. He's a selfish player. He has no post game.
I know this because I used to be one of those people. It was absurd to me that people thought Lebron was better than Kobe Bryant (although a few years ago it was much closer). Lebron hadn't won anything. He hadn't repeatedly carried his team through the playoffs as Kobe had done in the Smush Parker/Chris Mihm days. For a guy his size, he looked clueless and helpless with the ball down low. He shot too much and too poorly from midrange and beyond.
But over the past couple years, now that I've actually watched him play...it's so obvious that he is the best player in the league. Obviously anything can happen in the next 1-3 games, but I find it hard to believe that people can honestly think that Kevin Durant is a better player than Lebron.
I love KD. In my brief basketball fandom, he's one of the best scorers I've ever seen simply because he can score from anywhere on the court and with his athleticism and freakish length, there's often not much you can do to stop him other than hope that he misses. Still, I think that the suggestion that he is superior to Lebron is outright laughable.
The fact that this has even been brought up is proof enough for me that the massive microscope of criticism we've turned towards Lebron has blinded us from appreciating the entirety of his game. I mean over the first four games of the finals he's averaging a 29.3/10/6 line and making it look routine. In the regular season he led his teams in points, rebounds, assists, and steals.
But his dominance should be clear even without looking at the numbers. His rebounding, court vision, and passing are much better than most people his size or at his position and he can assert himself on both ends. On the offensive side of the court he's a strange combination of size and speed, which generally allows him to shoot where and when he pleases either by beating his man to his spot or bullying him off of it. His shooting has greatly improved since he was a rookie and, despite what haters might say, his post game has as well. On defense, his size and speed again give him an advantage as it allows him to guard every position effectively. While there are several players who could likely get the better of him over the course of a full game, I truly think he could be fine defending anyone (without fouling) in the NBA for at least a handful of possessions.
Meanwhile Kevin Durant just played the biggest game of his life and the 6'9" (who many claim is closer to 6'11") forward grabbed two rebounds in 46 minutes of play (exactly the same amount as Miami's backup point guard Norris Cole had in eight minutes) and got outleaped on a crucial jump ball by Shane Battier, a 33 year old veteran with creaky legs. Durant's also had so many problems defending without fouling over the past few games that he was on point guards Mario Chalmers and Cole for long stretches of time.
This is not to hate on KD. He is a phenomenal player (and a good rebounder most of the time), but I don't know how else to illustrate what I perceive as a large, noticeable gap in between the two players. I don't know if any of this was actually necessary. I'd like to think not. I'd like to think that this was all very obvious, both because it would be nice if my views were validated and because again, I think it should be apparent to anyone who has watched basketball.
With all of this said, if the Miami Heat lose, especially now with a 3-1 lead, Lebron James's overwhelming talent will be even more obscured (granted, if they do lose three games in a row it's highly probable that harsh criticism of his game will be warranted). As fans, I feel like this hatred is preventing many of us from actually appreciating his game and realizing that we are, and have been, witnessing some of the finest displays of athletic ability on a basketball court. I get the backlash over The Decision. It was incredibly idiotic and out of touch. But are we really going to let a misguided 30 minute television special color our views so much that we miss out on just watching and letting ourselves be amazed at what Lebron does on the court on a nightly basis? I got over it and, if the Miami Heat close this out, it's about time everyone else did too.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Back in the game
I really enjoy Twitter. I understand the people who think that it's stupid or pointless and that the 140 character messages are a waste of internet space, but I've found it to be a fun way to engage with other users, whether it's actually having a conversation with them or just hearing what they have to say. It's interesting. You never really know what's going to happen when you send out a tweet (or retweet).
For example I recently started following the Twitter account of the Asian American Journalists' Association J Camp program. I was fortunate enough to participate in the program back in 2007 with 40ish other high school students, and I had a great time meeting new people and learning from professional journalists from all over. Over the past couple days they had tweeted at me and other alums asking what some of our favorite J Camp memories were as well as tweeting at incoming J Campers. It was fun tweeting back and forth with old friends, sharing memories as well as to the students about to go to J Camp (perhaps the one time I can tweet at high school girls without feeling creepy) welcoming them to the family. Thinking back on that week brought back a lot of memories. There were a lot of pretty impressive people, from our leaders, advisors, and guest speakers who all had successful careers at various establishments (CNN, ABC, Washington Post) as well as the other students. I haven't kept in touch that much, but I remember a good number of them being pretty smart and driven, and a quick perusal of Facebook (yay stalking) revealed that some of them are indeed in some pretty sweet positions in their journalism career.
Ironically enough, J Camp actually ended up pointing me away from journalism. A lot of the professionals I met mentioned that it wasn't that important to study it in school but that the main focus was just gaining writing experience. That was kind of the first step, but ultimately I think not going down that path was a good decision. I don't think that I have that passion or drive that the best journalists need as they pursue a scoop or tenaciously edit down a piece minutes before deadline.
But back then, I really loved to write. I wasn't (and still am not) the best verbal communicator and putting words on a page gave me an alternative way to communicate my thoughts and opinions. But somewhere along the line, it kind of just fell off. Maybe I got too self-conscious about what I was writing and scared that people would disagree or just flat out not like it. Maybe I got caught up in perfection. A lot of the times when I talk or write I am still thinking of what I want to say as I am saying it. It's actually pretty frustrating and leads to some pretty stupid, confusing things sometimes and maybe I was too afraid that things wouldn't come out just how I wanted to.
As I thought about J Camp, I remembered what made me want to go in the first place. The opportunity to get to know someone through an interview -- and then sharing that with everyone else. The thrill of filling an empty page with informative, entertaining, or just plan fun words. The feeling of accomplishment when you've taken an article that was too long and editing it until it says exactly what you want it to say and no more.
Looking at the tweets of the upcoming J Campers, I can tell they feel the same way. The ALL CAPS and exclamation points make it pretty evident (although maybe they're just excited to meet guest speaker Hoda Kotb? I would be).
So I decided, screw it. I'm just going to write whatever I want when I want to. I'm not going to worry about getting it perfectly right or who might think I'm stupid or wrong (no one reads this anyway...). As I'm preparing to move and essentially start a new life, it makes sense (to me at least) to also re-kickstart this blog. And you know what, it's been a great long while since my last "I haven't written in a while but I'm committing to writing lots more" post, and I'll give myself about a week or two before the posts stop coming again. So here come the posts. Whether it ends up actually being just a week or two or a long term thing, who knows. But it's going to be random and it's going to be awkward and basically, it's going to be me.
For example I recently started following the Twitter account of the Asian American Journalists' Association J Camp program. I was fortunate enough to participate in the program back in 2007 with 40ish other high school students, and I had a great time meeting new people and learning from professional journalists from all over. Over the past couple days they had tweeted at me and other alums asking what some of our favorite J Camp memories were as well as tweeting at incoming J Campers. It was fun tweeting back and forth with old friends, sharing memories as well as to the students about to go to J Camp (perhaps the one time I can tweet at high school girls without feeling creepy) welcoming them to the family. Thinking back on that week brought back a lot of memories. There were a lot of pretty impressive people, from our leaders, advisors, and guest speakers who all had successful careers at various establishments (CNN, ABC, Washington Post) as well as the other students. I haven't kept in touch that much, but I remember a good number of them being pretty smart and driven, and a quick perusal of Facebook (yay stalking) revealed that some of them are indeed in some pretty sweet positions in their journalism career.
Ironically enough, J Camp actually ended up pointing me away from journalism. A lot of the professionals I met mentioned that it wasn't that important to study it in school but that the main focus was just gaining writing experience. That was kind of the first step, but ultimately I think not going down that path was a good decision. I don't think that I have that passion or drive that the best journalists need as they pursue a scoop or tenaciously edit down a piece minutes before deadline.
But back then, I really loved to write. I wasn't (and still am not) the best verbal communicator and putting words on a page gave me an alternative way to communicate my thoughts and opinions. But somewhere along the line, it kind of just fell off. Maybe I got too self-conscious about what I was writing and scared that people would disagree or just flat out not like it. Maybe I got caught up in perfection. A lot of the times when I talk or write I am still thinking of what I want to say as I am saying it. It's actually pretty frustrating and leads to some pretty stupid, confusing things sometimes and maybe I was too afraid that things wouldn't come out just how I wanted to.
As I thought about J Camp, I remembered what made me want to go in the first place. The opportunity to get to know someone through an interview -- and then sharing that with everyone else. The thrill of filling an empty page with informative, entertaining, or just plan fun words. The feeling of accomplishment when you've taken an article that was too long and editing it until it says exactly what you want it to say and no more.
Looking at the tweets of the upcoming J Campers, I can tell they feel the same way. The ALL CAPS and exclamation points make it pretty evident (although maybe they're just excited to meet guest speaker Hoda Kotb? I would be).
So I decided, screw it. I'm just going to write whatever I want when I want to. I'm not going to worry about getting it perfectly right or who might think I'm stupid or wrong (no one reads this anyway...). As I'm preparing to move and essentially start a new life, it makes sense (to me at least) to also re-kickstart this blog. And you know what, it's been a great long while since my last "I haven't written in a while but I'm committing to writing lots more" post, and I'll give myself about a week or two before the posts stop coming again. So here come the posts. Whether it ends up actually being just a week or two or a long term thing, who knows. But it's going to be random and it's going to be awkward and basically, it's going to be me.
Monday, April 30, 2012
For the lols
I was looking through some old documents and I found the graduation speech I submitted four years ago for the speechwriting contest at high school. To be honest, once you get past the obvious pandering to school spirit and the whole high school student trying to sound sophisticated thing, I feel like the overall theme is not half bad.
On a random tangent, I remember I wanted to print the speeches that made the final round of the competition in our special, end of the year edition of our paper. Since it was basically a collection of thoughts and quotes from our senior class (for our senior class), it felt like it would be appropriate. It got shot down. Apparently the committee that was choosing the winner didn't want to whichever speech they picked to get overshadowed or something like that. Don't mind that I suspect very few people actually read our paper or that I would have noted and given special placement to the speech that won, or the fact that ultimately only one speech would have been presented. I'm still a little disappointed that they didn't let me go ahead with that, especially since, as editor in chief at the time, I felt like I should have been the one to make that call. It wasn't like my speech made it to the final round so it's not like I was trying to do any self-promoting or anything. Anyway, whatever. Here's what I rambled about 4 years ago:
On a random tangent, I remember I wanted to print the speeches that made the final round of the competition in our special, end of the year edition of our paper. Since it was basically a collection of thoughts and quotes from our senior class (for our senior class), it felt like it would be appropriate. It got shot down. Apparently the committee that was choosing the winner didn't want to whichever speech they picked to get overshadowed or something like that. Don't mind that I suspect very few people actually read our paper or that I would have noted and given special placement to the speech that won, or the fact that ultimately only one speech would have been presented. I'm still a little disappointed that they didn't let me go ahead with that, especially since, as editor in chief at the time, I felt like I should have been the one to make that call. It wasn't like my speech made it to the final round so it's not like I was trying to do any self-promoting or anything. Anyway, whatever. Here's what I rambled about 4 years ago:
When I was
a kid, my life was pretty much set for me. I was going to breeze through high
school and head off to my dream college. First it was Stanford, and then when I
found out how hard it is to get in to, I set my sights a little lower and aimed
for Columbia. I came to Woodbridge as a freshman with this plan, but these last
four years have been nothing like the quick stop I thought they would be. On a
day like today, a proud day for me and every graduating Warrior, it would be
easy just to revel in the moment and forget about the future. But instead of a celebration of the present,
this day should be a celebration of things to come and a springboard from which
we will set out to achieve these things.
Of course though we’re leaping off this springboard, that
doesn’t mean we know where it’s going to take us. You know what they say about
the best laid plans of mice and men, so why am I even bothering to talk about
what’s going to happen in the future? Certainly my naïve, idealistic plan
didn’t pan out as my 8th grade self would have expected, as I’m not
going to Columbia or Stanford or any other top ranked private university for
that matter. But just because we don’t know what’s coming doesn’t mean we
shouldn’t reach for our goals, because in doing so, who knows what things we
may grab hold of instead.
Maybe it sounds stupid or cliché, but when we aim high,
though we might not always get what we expect, there’s no doubt that our
efforts will be rewarded. Coming out of middle school I was a budding
volleyball player with an ambition in talk radio who enjoyed some writing on
the side. The talk radio thing sputtered as I gave up even listening to it in
favor of pretty much anything else. My volleyball “career” (if you could call
it that) was stunted in short order. Instead I played 4 years of high school
tennis, 3 of which were on the varsity level. But I did get to write for the
school paper and even reached an editor position in my senior year. I guess one
out of three ain’t bad.
In these past four years I’ve had experiences that,
looking back, I can’t imagine missing out on, yet these are also things I
wouldn’t have expected either. Much of what I accomplished in high school
wasn’t the result of some great scheme and meticulous planning, but rather hard
work and a little luck. If nothing else, I’ve learned that good things happen
to people who work at it because you never know who might be watching you,
prepared to commend and reward your effort.
As we, the class of 2008, head off to college, work, the
military, or any other endeavor, I encourage every person here to strive after
your goals, but also prepare to deal with change. If all of us gave up simply
because our initial plan didn’t work, many of us would simply be bums, living
off the generosity of others. How many successful businessmen and women are
here today? And how many of you wanted to be a veterinarian or an astronaut or
a famous singer or rock star when you were young? No matter how lofty our goals
are, we can never give up on ourselves simply because things don’t go our way.
I realized there was no way I was getting into Stanford, yet here I stand
before all of you today, headed to a college where I feel I can thrive. Did I
quit because I couldn’t go to a school I once thought was a perfect fit for me?
No, and if you believe in fate, maybe, just maybe things worked out so that I
would be up here sending you this message today. And if you’re the kind of
person who’s more about creating your own luck, here I am, not really anything
special, but giving the graduation speech for my high school. Who would have
thought?
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Happy Easter!
I wish I could do a better job of daily remembering the sacrifice that Christ has made for me by dying on the cross for my sins and the miracle of his resurrection, defeating death and sin for good. For something that has such a large and powerful impact on my life, I sure don't live, act, or think like that's the case a lot of the time. May it be something we can all truly remember, especially today.
The Resurrection
1 After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb. 2 There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. 3 His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. 4 The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men. 5 The angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. 6 He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. 7 Then go quickly and tell his disciples: 'He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.' Now I have told you." 8 So the women hurried away from the tomb, afraid yet filled with joy, and ran to tell his disciples. 9 Suddenly Jesus met them. "Greetings," he said. They came to him, clasped his feet and worshiped him. 10 Then Jesus said to them, "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me."
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